Gumby: still in one piece even after all this time.
All week the kids have been looking forward to giving Greta this vibrating ball we bought her. She barks madly at anything that moves, so why wouldn’t she go nuts at a moving ball that makes weird noises? Cole has been talking about how we will win some sort of imaginary video award and lots of money over a video of Greta going crazy for the latest and greatest toy she has ever had. We drew straws over who would get to be the one to hand it to her but, in true dog form, she was completely unpredictable. We turned it on, and she walked away. She didn’t even double take. So we don’t have a cute video of a hilarious reaction to this most “amazing” toy despite a whole week of anticipation. We just have a picture of old tried and true – Gumby – the toy she went over and picked up after the failed video attempt. I guess some dogs just know what they want.
If we don’t get to Charlie first thing in the morning she meows by the front door and waits. Apparently, this morning she was too hungry to wait and took matters into her own…claws. She had just started eating her own freshly caught breakfast when I came out with her cat food. I guess I was thankful that she didn’t smear the insides across the front porch like she usually does, though I am not sure what our fickle feline will do with the leftovers. It’s going to be another long hot day here in Florida and our cat might get a little creative. I just know we have our own Checkpoint Charlie guarding our yard. Cole likes to say she is part of the “No Squirrels Allowed” club he and Adam have formed. My boys think she is the coolest cat in the world.
Is it cruel to hide the toys that annoy you away from your dog? Greta loves a good squeak toy. I want Greta to be happy. But a good squeak toy is a loud squeak toy and I just can’t tolerate two rambunctious little boys and a constantly squeaking dog all summer. So, I have hidden all her squeaky toys and opted during my last dog toy buying spree for a toy with a bell inside. So far, Greta hasn’t pulled apart the rubber weave or been able to wedge out the bell so it has been a good buy. Cole and Adam roll it around with Greta chasing and trailing behind, and there aren’t a lot of activities that all three of my “kids” can play together. This ball has been added to what I call Greta’s “baby” collection and more often than not I find her sleeping with her head propped on top of her ball or a paw draped over it like she is sleeping with a lovey. The benefit has also been we have been able to replace her football “baby”, which she would intermittently squeak in the wee hours of the night, with her new rubber ball “baby” and we have gotten more sleep in the process.
Trying to get a picture of Greta with her bone is like trying to sneak up on a deer, a fierce, territorial deer. I am not sure what kind of animal bone this is, but judging by its size and the way she anxiously guards it, I think it might be something rare and extinct like woolly mammoth, or stegosaurus. She has managed to separate what looks like a knee cap from the rest of the bone. This has been quite problematic for her because she can’t control both pieces with her mouth at the same time. She can only carry one piece and, when approached, tries desperately to drag all of her bone loot to another “safer” part of the yard where she can chew and guard her prizes undisturbed. After two weeks she is still wearing herself out chewing on this “toy” night and day and seems to be calmer physically, like all that jaw movement releases the tension in her limbs. However, another week of needless worry over getting her bone stolen just might turn her into one of the most neurotic dogs ever.
Greta’s best Dobie friend has a rope ball toy identical to the one we got Greta, so we thought this new toy would be a “gimme.” We forgot that Greta’s penchant for chewing is far more obsessive than her buddy, Raven’s. The ball actually floats in water and is easier to find at the dog park than some of Greta’s tennis balls, but the moment she decided to keep the ball for herself and not give it back, she handily separated the ball section from the woven rope in only a few bites. So, now she has two toys that are better for choking than playing and we have had to remove the toy entirely. The six leashes, two harnesses, and one collar she has chewed through in three minutes or less should have been a forewarning that a rope toy would be rather wasteful, but we just didn’t get the message. It’s back to regular old tennis balls for this Dobie.
I make my two young sons figure out my iPhone apps on their own. I decided that being able to decode a handheld game is important for a child’s development. So, why is it that when it comes to my dog I am a complete pushover? When we first got the Buster Food Cube I assumed Greta would get the hang of it pretty quickly. I was so wrong. It’s taken a long time for Greta to understand this toy. I spent several weeks kicking it around, filling it to the brim with food so she could get food more quickly with little effort, but I soon found that I was the only one of us working at it. Greta was just waiting until food fell out and she was getting rewarded for nothing except outsmarting me, which apparently takes less effort than I thought. I was running around out of breath, kicking a cube while she sat and waited for treats. I changed tactics and I began using the cube to feed her dinner.
I could tell at first she felt cheated. Dinner I have to work for? But I learned that when Greta is hungry enough she drops her lazy affect and gets to being a little more persistent. Now, she is able to pick the whole cube up in her jaw and will bring it to me when she wants to play. The Buster Food Cube is one of my favorite toys because she can successfully entertain herself without my help, and it only took me two weeks to figure it out.
Greta has found an indestructible toy: Gumby! She works and works on him, but she can’t manage to tear a leg off despite her best efforts. Her interest in Gumby has remained high, possibly because she can’t figure out why she can’t rip him in half. She drags Gumby into her crate, her bath, the yard, and takes turns chewing on him between mouthfuls of her orthopedic pet bed. She holds different limbs down with her paw, takes his torso in her jaw, and whips her head back and forth.
The result? Gumby usually ends up far-flung on top of a piece of furniture across the room. I can almost see the wheels turning in Greta’s head: “I can render suede, leather, and bone, why can’t I pop this guy’s head off!” Other than dents that seem to self-heal, Gumby is unscathed after each Greta attack. We love Gumby: he is dog-safe and Dobie-approved.
Second week into our search for perfect toys for Greta, and I notice her Duckworth Splash plushie in the yard. Toys in the yard only end up in the yard because Greta loves them. She drags her favorite toys out there to toss around to herself. We thought at some point she would learn to play fetch with us but the only game she really likes is “keep away” and it never lasts for long because if she has something she wants to keep away from us, we never manage to get it. Greta quickly grows bored of winning. “Fetch” is what we do after Greta is finished playing with a toy and one of us has to go and get it and bring it inside. I guess we didn’t “fetch” Duckworth when we should have and now Duckworth has to stay outside because the nappy hair hasn’t come clean even after several rounds through the washer.
So, Duckworth may be a perfect toy after all. We have noticed Greta loves the feel of matted fur in her mouth. She chews on Duckworth but she never rips him up. She just tosses him in the air until she gets bored and leaves him outside until next time. Perfect.
Greta is bored. We are running her every evening, giving her play time outside with a ball every afternoon, and giving her plenty of chews in between, but she is going through some sort of energy spurt. She has returned to her digging habit, has shredded her orthopedic bed, pooping out rolls of foam every morning, and has torn apart most of her toys. She used to sleep with a Skineez toy, but recently ripped it’s head off and we suspect she ate the squeaker as well. So, we are experimenting. Max, her fave PetMeds stuffie, made it longer than most of her other toys. But, Greta stayed busy and eventually made six stuffies out of one. Right now Max is occupying five rooms. His leg is on the ottoman in the living room, his head has been pushed under the bed, parts of his torso are in the kitchen and bathroom and he has at least one arm lying around somewhere in the backyard. She hides another leg in one of our laundry baskets, among clean and folded clothes of course, and she sleeps with his other arm tucked into her half-shredded mattress in her half-eaten bed. I watch her tossing his body parts around and I wonder, what will Greta shred next?
It’s day 27 of the squirrel war in our backyard. Greta is still losing, but Charlie the cat has had some wins. We have seen remnants from her favorite corner on the porch. Do most cat owners have to bleach a section of their home after sweeping up leftover innards their little darlings have left? I wouldn’t bother so much; except her corner is right next to the front door and the mailman won’t come to the front door if the flies have gotten to the fresh meat before I have. I am often asked if our cat is friendly. I guess that all depends on who is asking.
Coquina rescued her precious Doberman puppy Greta from squalor on a South Florida farm at the tender age of 8 weeks. Since then she's been balancing being a work-at-home mom with raising two young sons, a dog, and a cat. This is their story.
